Millennial Dating – Date 2 “is it me?!”

I can’t believe after such a horrible date – he would still want to talk to me, but here we are texting back and forth. I can be honest and tell y’all now I wasn’t super moved or moved at all by our conversations but I figured hey I’m still getting to know you so it may get better.

Maybe 2 weeks after the first date and us texting, “are you free around 2, tomorrow?” He asked.

Ok here’s a shot for a better date I thought, “yea” I replied simple and to the point.

“Smorgasburg is going to be at prospect park … I think it would better if I scoop you and we go together than meet up do to no parking out there … if that’s cool with you”

“Ok, that’s cool with me,” I responded. I love Smorgasburg and it’s outside so this should be a better environment- it’s not so in my face.

“Word ….. so send you’re location on where I have to pick up the queen 😏” he eagerly texted back.

Listen sir the date is tomorrow and I’m not sure why you think I’m going to give you my house address, so I responded by giving him the intersection 2 blocks away.

The next day…

it’s now date day and I have to figure out what to wear. I’m not sure about everyone else but it takes me about 5 outfits to finally decide “Yup this is the one, I’m shutting shit down In this fit!” Well this was no exception and probably even worse – I gotta make up for the last date!

So i go through all the motions of getting ready and realize it’s 1pm and I’m not even close to ready. I start to rush and my anxiety starts to act up again and all I can think is, “Not today! I will not be embarrassed and cut a date short twice with the same person.” I start to relax my nerves and then my phone goes off, “Good afternoon miss, you ready yet” comes up on my screen.

It’s not 2 just yet – so I have some time “hey, nope not just yet.”

“What time you want me to scoop you, 2:15ish”

“Yupp that’s perfect lol”

“Say less” he responded and I proceeded to finish getting myself ready.

It was like the middle of July and HOT as hell outside, so I threw on a cute little slip dress, sandals and pulled my hair up into a wet bun and just as I finished he was outside. When he arrived I meet him at the intersection, I had previously told him to get me from. I got in his car, we hugged, he complimented me and we started on our way.

Y’all I just want to stop and say when I saw that his car was a Honda Accord I was surprised because the first thought that came to mind “he fits into that?!” I expected a truck or something a little larger than that, but hey his car, his legs, HOS comfort. Surprisingly he fit – I mean barely but he fit.

The car ride to Smorgasburg wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t anything memorable either. Of course if you’re from Brooklyn, or have just ever been to prospect park – you know how crowded it is down there and parking is HELLA HARD to come by. We drove around for 10 min, before finding a spot at a hydrant, “ummm you know that’s a hydrant right?” I asked with a bit of confusion and puzzled look. “Yea but I have this pass,” he pulls out his C.O. parking pass “we look out for each other,” he said so proudly.  I started to go on about how I thought it was a bad idea, but I thought hey it’s his car, I’m sure he knows what he’s doing.

As we walk to the park, I can see everyone staring in awe at how tall he was, hell standing next to him I was too in amazement.

“How often does someone comment on your height?” I asked

“If I had a nickel for every time I’d be rich”

“I’m sure – you’re really tall”

Before he could say something, we begin to see a bunch of people with all types of food, “I’m super excited about this.” I stated.

I absolutely love food and was super excited  about all the food we were about to be around. With a nice smile, “yea me too.” He said.

We enter Smorgasburg and the only thing I can think about is how hot it is. We picked a horrible day to go – clear blue skies and sunny. There was barely any shade so we walked around and sat in the sun. I’m not sure what exactly it was but I just wasn’t feeling him and I’ve been fighting with my anxiety since we pretty much got there.

Maybe it’s the sun and I’m psyching myself out. We both were covered in sweat, he and I were both ready to go, “wanna go to the movies.”

“Yupp, to see what?!”

I’m not going to lie I forgot what we saw- but he told me to pick the theater, so I picked fresh meadows, because It’s usually quiet there. “Oh you’re bougie,” he said.

Millennial Dating | You Me NYC

Excuse me – you asked me what theater and I told you a basic one and I’m bougie?! You don’t even know me well enough to jokingly call me anything but Taty, I thought. However, all I said was “no you asked me my theater choice and I advised,” trying not to seem annoyed.The ride to the theater was a little awkward, we barely spoke the first time we were in the car but now it’s like a silent car ride for-real. Maybe because I was eating, he didn’t want to interrupt me, I’m not sure but whatever.

 

By the time we got to the movie it had already started. We quickly got in and got our seats. After the movie was over we did the normal talk about it, as he drove me home (well to the intersection). When we got there we said our goodbyes and he drove off.

I didn’t let my anxiety get the best of me this date which I was really happy about,  but I definitely wasn’t moved by this young man in person and I was a little disappointed.

But hey maybe it’s me – I’ve been out of the dating world for some years now, I have to get used to it right?!

Millennial Dating in NYC

I’ve been in a relationship for the last 5 years. No, it hasn’t been just one relationship in the last 5 years, but two separate relationships. Relationship one was right out of college. For me that was it, he was the one. I’ve been in love with him since the third grade and we both were finally at a point in our lives that it made sense and it was the right time. The first few months were hard as I lived in DC (finishing up my last semester) and he lived in Brooklyn. Little did I know that moving home would be such a bittersweet thing for us. That relationship lasted for about a year and a half.

Then, I found myself all in love all over again and this time this person would be the one I share my life with. We met at work and started a flirtatious friendship that grew into something beautiful. I felt like I was dating my best friend. We experienced so much together from tragic losses, major moves and vacations just to name a few.  When that relationship ended it really took a lot out of me. I didn’t only lose a lover I lost my best friend.  Like any normal person (or female depending on who’s reading and interpreting lol) I hit a state of feeling lonely and a little depressed. 3 months later my mother decided to put me on a dating app. Yes, I said it a dating app. I was super against it because I thought it was weird, but hell I figure anything is better than being sad. Well here it goes newly single and a millennial dating in NYC – what’s the worse that can happen, right?

Date 1: Anxiety got the best

“How’s work?” he texted.

“I’m ready to go home I’m aggravated now,” I responded.

Two simple messages led to what in my opinion might have been the WORST first date I could have been on. We agreed to meet at 8:30pm at a restaurant not far from where either one of us lived. I was so nervous leading up to the time, I had pep talks with myself, my cousin, my mom and my boss (listen a girl needs some reassurance after being off the market for 5 years).

I arrived and parked my car down the block, I didn’t want to park close because you never know who’s legit, weirdo or not, safety first. When I got there he was already there waiting for me so we can be seated. When he stood up to greet me, I was definitely taking back about how tall he was. His 6’6 muscular frame seemed really large next to my 5’7 slim frame. I was starting to relax, but after seeing him all those nervous feelings came back and I think I wasn’t prepared for how tall he was. But I gathered myself and my thoughts (so I thought) and we sat down.Millennial Dating NYC | You Me NYCThe restaurant was dimly lit, tables were close together and the AC was in full effect. We sat across from each other and started to talk, you know a basic conversation trying to get to know each other. About 5 min in, I started to feel a little tight chested and light-headed. The waiter came and took our drink orders, I got a margarita and I honestly forgot what he ordered, but we did end up ordering calamari as well. About 15 minutes into the date, I had to excuse myself from the table, my anxiety started to get the best of me and I needed a minute.

I went to the restroom to breathe and recollect myself so I could finish this date. When I got back to the table, I took a sip of my drink and tried to resume like nothing was wrong. Unfortunately for both of us, I was not successful at that. After being there for all of 30 min – I had to leave the entire date. I couldn’t sit there anymore – I needed fresh air and I needed to be out the situation. I felt extremely bad and embarrassed, but I did not tell him it was my anxiety, instead, I said I wasn’t really feeling well. Not a total lie, but I just knew I had blown it. He told me it was ok and not to worry about.

I left and instantly called my mother to tell her how embarrassed I was. Again she reassured me things happen and reach out to him. He’ll either genuinely be understanding or not and of course, she was right, but let’s never tell her that. He was genuinely understanding and eager to have a make-up date.