Shit, if You Can Make it Here, You Can Make it Anywhere!

If you can make it here, you can make it anywhere. People have always used this as a coping mechanism when the city overwhelms you. But what about the people who have been here their whole lives? What are our mechanisms? The ones that survived what people couldn’t do for six months. What are our words of encouragement to keep going? 

New York is advertised as the fun, loud, entertaining city that never sleeps, filled with assholes too caught up in the hustle and bustle to say hello. When that’s not taking place, it becomes an episode of “Law and Order.” But when you take away all of that bullshit, what’s left to entertain you? If those things didn’t exist, would you guys continue to come here? Would you continue to see this as a stepping stone if it didn’t come with those things? When people come here they think we’re just used to it. People have been known to enjoy cold weather, but no one likes being cold. No one gets used to the wear and tear this city can have on your physical and mental well-being. 

Conclusion

What helps is the perspective of this place. The city is so unique people forget it’s a whole state. It’s not even the capital but it plays such a major part on how New York is viewed as a whole. It’s easy to get caught up and one of the ways to get out is to take in some nature. Trees literally help you breathe. If I were surrounded by skyscrapers and trains and “New York” life all day long, I’d have a panic attack all to myself…: which has literally happened to me. Being native to this surrounding, I’ve learned to drown out certain things and internalize others. It’s one of those things I’m still working on myself. Just don’t forget to breathe. Shit… this society; in this day and age, if you choose to keep going in this life, choose to wake up this morning without complaints. You already made it! You already won. For my native New Yorkers, just keep doing what we do best, keep moving and grooving!  

The Power of (Black) Women

After seeing the Black Panther movie and being part of the whole “Wakanda Movement”, Black Women are back on the map!  I know many people don’t think so…I am here to tell you, we are.  That movie showed impeccable strength, dedication, power, illumination, sense of character and family.

So many women, have no idea, of the power they instill in themselves. I can reassure you, that this is only the beginning of a new end.  When I say the beginning of a new end, I am referring to those women who think there lives are over, due to dead end jobs, family obligations, lifeless relationships and more. You can become POWERFUL.
(Willie Mae Williams my Great Grandmother)
Willie Mae Williams You Me NYC
(Powerful Black Woman Passed at 105 years old)
Not only is it Women’s History Month, we should  be celebrating every day of our lives as to how powerful we are.  I mean power of the mind, body, and soul! What do you want from your life?  Are you afraid to go out and get what you truly desire? I know I use to be afraid to let the world see how talented I am.  I was hiding in the shadows because I didn’t have a degree, I was allowing my  peers to treat me as if I didn’t matter.  Many of them had all these so called great careers, I was making more money than they were and I never said a word.  When people brag and boast about what they have, they lose it quickly.

As a powerful woman, you must stand your ground and figure out what it is, that you want out of life. I’m a “Silent Warrior”, I kill people with kindness but I also back away slowly.  I was in the literary field for over 10 years before going over to Civil Service and now I am a published author, life coach, empowerment speaker, and giver of life.  I use to put my family and friends first and when I realized that they weren’t doing the same for me, I decided to change my life.  I woke up one Sunday morning and said “What in the world are you doing to yourself?” I was exhausted and grew to resent them.  I was unhappy because they didn’t respect me.  That’s when I said “I have to learn to respect myself and stop letting other people take advantage of me.”

As a powerful black woman, we endure so much pain.  We deal with horrible bosses, who don’t know or value our worth.  We stay in dead end relationships hoping our mates are going to change for the better.  Our children are all over the place, driving us crazy, by not succeeding in school or unwilling to participate in after school or weekend activities that we pay for.  It can wear and tear on a woman’s soul.  They say “We are at the bottom of the totem pole.”  I refuse to believe that old saying.  I think we are at the top of the totem pole.  We are just fearful on how to get to the top because we allow individuals and groups to stop us from shining.

Among my research, I found this remarkable tribe, called the “Umoja Village.”  They are a Sisterhood that believes in protecting their own.   Umoja, means “unity” in Swahili. They are an all female matriarch village founded in 1990, located near the town of Samburu County, in the capital of Nairobi.  It was founded by Rebecca Lolosoli, a Samburu woman, as a sanctuary for homeless survivors of violence against women and young girls running from forced marriages.  The women of the Samburu people, do not agree with violence and the traditional subordinate position of women.
(Umoja Village)
Umoja Village You Me NYC
(Umoja Village)
Their story moved me so much, it is similar to what I believe in.  I am a strong believer in teaching, guiding, and protecting my village.  Thanks to my Associate Myra, after a couple of weeks of researching on powerful black women.  She assisted me in finding this tribe.  If a village there in Africa can do it, then why can’t we here in America?  All my life, I heard the saying “It takes a village to raise a child.” So where are all the villages? There is a majority of black women who don’t care about assisting other black women, that’s scary, yet they are the first to complain when something doesn’t go their way.

I want you all to remember that black is the most powerful color in the world. No other color can outshine it.  No matter what, you mix it with…the black and brown are going to show up in some form of fashion.  As a black woman, I want other women to become more dynamic and look for ways to help other women become influential.  Taking baby steps is the key to becoming great. As my best friend Sinatra, always use to say to me “You are destined for greatness.” That statement is so compelling!  You see, women are powerful no matter your economic status, cultural background, neighborhood or education.  We all have something unique inside of us that is destined to soar.

I am going to give you some quick tips to become even more powerful!

Tip #1 – Stop being a people pleaser!
Tip #2 – What is your dream, aspiration or goal?
Tip #3 – Do you have a hobby or something that you are good at?
Tip #4 – Focus on one goal, dream or aspiration at a time?
Tip #5 – Learn to say NO to people and work on you!
Tip #6 – Give yourself a timeline of 30, 60 or 90 days to accomplish one goal.
Tip #7 – Don’t forget to show gratitude, to how far you’ve come in reaching your goals.

When you get the chance, check out my book “Ready Set Go, 30 Days of Motivation To Get You To The Next Level.

Blessings,
Ms. Mikki A. Ealey